Lesson 21 (Proverbs chapter 19:1-14)
Chapter 19
V.1 Many that become very self confident become self absorbed and begin to live by their own set of rules. Often a person who has the perspective of getting what they want will do almost anything to get it. In doing so all too often their integrity is compromised and they get a reputation of not being trustworthy. Because of this eventually others avoid them and begin to take their business elsewhere. The KJV says that their language often gives them away becoming slick in their dialogue, tending to put their competitors down instead of telling you the value of their product and often use foul language. The poor may not have much, but one thing that they cannot take away if they are an honest person is their integrity.
V. 2 We make our decisions from down inside us. Call it the soul or the heart, we make decisions from down in that core place referred to here as the soul. Making decisions from here is natural. It is the seat of our decision making process. Solomon says that it is not good to be void of wisdom and understanding stored up in this place called the heart/soul ready to be used in advance of making those decisions, especially important ones. In this verse he actually focuses more on the knowledge aspect stored down inside that is acquired from life experiences and from study or being taught. He says that having this knowledge stored up is essential for making decisions, especially good ones, when life calls upon us to do so.
It is also interesting that Solomon often puts related items in a proverb together. In the second part of this proverb he talks about hasty decisions or being in a hurry to get somewhere or getting something fast. In doing so, we often do not think things through and can tend to compromise good judgment, erring in our way. Our actions can err by making a mistake like going down the wrong road or missing a step in a particular process or we can err making a bad judgment by compromising our principles and sinning in the process. Both are usually in essence a product of greed, or ‘I want’. Solomon’s advice would probably be that we might want to slow down a little allowing us to think things through so that we can make better decisions as we move forward.
V. 3 Being foolish, as a lifestyle or as a temporary indulgence, puts life on a road to disaster. Where we are in life and how life is treating us is often a sum total of the choices that we make prior to getting there. Foolish choices have a disastrous outcome and affect life making it miserable. However, we often forget that it was us that made the choices getting us where we are. We usually end up blaming others around us for our pain and suffering, it’s their fault or life has dealt me a bad hand. Ultimately, as we look for who is to blame for our predicament, we make our way to God, ending up blaming Him for our bad judgment. All too often, this blame turns into anger, being angry with God when it was not His doing. The New Living translation puts it this way, ‘People ruin their lives by their own foolishness and then are angry with the Lord’.
V. 4 Wealth has a way of making others amiable toward us when otherwise they would not give us the time of day. The wealthy person that Solomon is referring to here is not just someone that is well off or doing ok so to speak. The person he refers to here is just plain ‘Rich’. Very well off and because they are very well off, they are probably also famous. Everyone wants to be the friend of a wealthy famous person. To be connected to someone like that somehow makes us important also, famous or wealthy by association. However, the total opposite, the poor, gets a totally opposite reaction from others. The reaction that they get is pretty much total denial that anyone is their friend. They may get help from others, but friend is pretty much a foreign word to them. Solomon says that even their neighbor keeps their distance and does not want to be even remotely associated with them.
V. 5 The truth has a way of coming out eventually. Telling a lie or giving false testimony at first may give the appearance of the cover-up being successful or making a false accusation stick inflecting the intended damage. But, in the end it more often than not comes back on the one bearing false testimony, inflecting greater damage on them than their opponent. Billy Graham use to frequently say concerning doing wrong thinking that no one will know or find out, ‘be sure, your sin will find you out’. Jesus said be careful what you say or do in secret, it will be shouted from the rooftop.
V. 6 It has been said that it is not what you know, it is who you know. A prince has the reputation of giving his friends special gifts and privileges just because. It is nice to get something for nothing. The only place you find something for free with no strings attached is from a generous person. The first part of this verse seems to refer to that kind of person. However, some gifts come attached with expectations as we have seen in other proverbs. The second part of this verse may contain this component. However, the observation here is that ‘every one is a friend to him that gives gifts’.
V. 7 Again, Solomon makes an observation concerning the poor. He says that even their family members shun and avoid them only connecting with them when they absolutely have to. No matter how the poor plea or work at relationships or friendships they are barely given the time of day. It says that even if the poor pursue friendships that they find friendships wanting or nonexistent. I am reminded here that ‘the poor’ who no one wants to be associated with could refer also to uneducated or simple people, which often times include those with obvious physical handicaps.
V. 8 It is directly beneficial to those who learn wisdom and work at getting understanding to do so. He says if you ‘Love’ wisdom and understanding you nourish your own soul giving yourself life. Some versions use the word prosper referring to keeping or holding onto understanding and finding good as a result.
V. 9 This verse is very similar to v. 5. V. 5 and 9 both refer to the act of falsifying information and it’s coming back around inflicting punishment on the one bearing false witness. But, the second part here in v. 9 is different making the point that false witnesses and liars fade away or parish pointing out the end result of this act and/or lifestyle.
V. 10 There are things in this life that typically don’t seem to go together. Hot and cold. Fast and Slow. It is either one or the other. It can’t be both. They are opposites. To have it easy or to live in luxury is not the outcome of a fool and his foolish living. Even if they were to gain a gift or inheritance what they got would not last long because of foolish actions and mismanagement. The end is always the same no matter what they begin with. Solomon also makes the point that certain people are made for certain things or duties or responsibilities. Here he makes the argument that princes have a certain make up or ability to make decisions under pressure that watch out for or affect others, whereas, someone that is a servant would probably buckle under the same situation. However, a true servant actually gets pleasure serving other’s needs, whereas, a prince wouldn’t know the first thing about doing the same. Switching roles can work from time to time, but only if those switching roles were in the wrong role to begin with. If we were to apply this to today he would recommend that we be sure to place the right man in the right position to do the job. Putting someone in management when it is the next promotional step when they are not cut out for that position is usually disastrous. It would be a bad move for the company and a bad move for the individual.
V.11 Ever get so steamed that it is hard not to blow up? A wise man doesn’t allow it to get to that point. He has been there before…probably more than once. We lose something when we get into the anger zone. We lose discretion, the ability to show discernment and good judgment in the situation. More times than not our speech shows that we have lost discretion and discernment. A wise person sets anger on a shelf, off to the side, early in a situation. They know that using anger as a vehicle to get their point across can get messy. The second part of the verse goes on to say that there is one important element involved in this encounter that makes this situation work. Unless this virtue is exercised one may pick up anger back off of the shelf letting it again dominate the situation. Solomon says that a person of discretion is respected because he decides to not make too big of a point of the offence. Forgiveness exercised makes him look strong often causing a yielding of the other individual to begin to give way in his direction.
DISCRETION
1
: the quality of having or showing discernment or good judgment : the quality of being discreet : circumspection;especially : cautious reserve in speech
2
V. 12 You want to be on the right wave length with someone who has some pull or who has the ability to impact your life substantially. In olden days it was a king. In our day it could be your boss or someone you want to stay on the right side of, like your landlord. People get moody. When they are happy they tend to overlook things. When in a bad mood what pleased them yesterday annoys them today. It is not a bad idea to save that good idea or personal favor or request for the right day, when they are in a better mood. Getting to know those who have significant pull and influence on our well being is not a bad idea. Pitching our request or idea may be smiled upon or approved on the right day when the same request may put us in a bad light with significant repercussions on another day. It is wise to remember that timing is important when dealing with those can affect our well being. Also, people are people, and all people like to be respected and thought of or taken into consideration. Doing things that are not the norm, like helping out unexpectedly, can help those that have jurisdiction over some area of your life to be more considerate of your need when that time comes.
V. 13 Not much is worse for a father than bearing the shame of the calamities of a foolish son, except…a contentious wife. A wife that nags and argues all the time Solomon says is like a constant drip. There is nothing worse than a drip that just won’t stop no matter what you do,… or say for that matter. One of the most annoying things in life is a constant drip and a contentious wife ranks right up there with it. A contentious wife drives a man through irritation instead of wooing her mate with an appropriate spirit. A contentious spirit like a dripping faucet will eventually elicit the response of irritation and/or aggressive responses or it may encourage those present to leave finding more peaceful surroundings.
V. 14 There are some things that you get from your parents, or other sources and then there are those things that are from God. It is true that all good things are from God. The Bible acknowledges this. But, many things are delivered through other people and/or through other methods or circumstances. However, there are those things that there is no doubt were sent directly from God. We receive things from our parents, we work hard for other things thinking we have earned what we get, we save, and pay our dues to receive good things, but Solomon says that a good (prudent) wife is a gift directly from God no matter how you look at it. Prudence by definition has the meaning of being able to exercise skill and good judgment in the use of resources and in managing of daily affairs. If God is the giver of a prudent wife or a God honoring husband then it would be wise to seek Him in the process of looking, asking His help and guidance in the search.
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