Proverbs Study – Lesson 50 (Proverbs chapter 31)
In chapter 31:1-9 we hear the words and advice of a king to those who will listen. They were taught to him by his mother giving him advice for life warning him of snares that are bigger dangers than one might at first think, capable of bringing down great and prominent men. She names two areas of concern in particular, probably the most common and destructive snares known to man. It is important here to mention the importance of godly parents and the lifelong influence they can have on even a king. In v. 1 King Lamuel makes the point that his mother took the time to instruct him and tells us that now that he is a man he is glad for it honoring his mother and women like her for it. In the latter part of this chapter he gives us a detailed description of probably the best account in scripture of a godly woman or mother. Most of us have never had the chance to have such an influence in our life and he paints a description of what we should be looking for, or as a young girl what you should be striving to become. On day I asked my children to name me those in our congregation who they thought were examples to them of godly women and they named only a few. Their response was their opinion mind you and not an exhaustive list, but an important observation to them.
In v. 2 he makes the point that his mother cared about him enough to instruct him warning him concerning these things. In v. 3 she makes the point that in giving yourself to a woman (or to a man) you are transferring everything that you have to her giving her the keys to the city so to speak. In giving yourself to a woman even for a brief moment she also gets your strength transferring your power to her. In saying this she is in essence asking her son to ask the question ‘can this person be trusted?’ Can I trust this person in a relationship when I am defenseless?’ When asking this question alarms should go off saying ‘Danger. Potential Danger. Use good judgment here. Make sure you use discretion here. Remember what your mother and father taught you. A mistake here could cause you ruin and devastation’. In the latter part of v. 3 she warns of a particular type of woman to be careful of calling her the type of woman that destroys kings. In doing so, we get the point, getting an immediate picture of the type of woman that his mother warned him of.
He goes on in v. 4 telling us that his mother also warned him of another danger making the point in the following verses that if you want to get somewhere in life you must set aside this so called pleasure. She tells him very plainly that if he is going to be a king that he cannot drink wine saying that drinking wine is not for kings or anyone else of prominence that is doing important things or in a responsible position. She reminds him in v. 5 a king has a position of responsibility and needs to keep a clear head. His decisions affect people’s lives and should not be taken lightly. Because of this, being in that position, you are required to give up certain so called pleasures.
He goes on in v. 6-7 to tell us that strong drink does have a purpose, if one might call it a benefit, telling us that it is useful in helping finish off someone that is headed for destruction and can help to ease the pain and a heavy heart temporarily…even though there are side effects and after effects that may be worse than the thing that it is trying to help. V. 7 makes the point that this therapy is so effective that it has the capability of completely numbing the emotional pain that one may be experiencing. However, in reality, in using this remedy you leave one pain behind and trade it for another which may be even worse…i.e. the cure is worse than the disease.
His mother also taught him in v. 8-9 that it is a good thing to get involved if someone is needing your assistance. In v. 8 he is not necessarily referring to someone who is actually dumb or cannot talk, but would also include those who are silenced, not being allowed to talk or state their case. There are innocent people who at times get caught in bureaucracy or are manipulated by procedures used by those intending to silence an individual making them for all practical purposes in essence dumb. If they could only be allowed to speak what they would say could make a difference. Instead, being silenced, they are appointed to destruction with no one to defend them. The Bible in Basic English translates v. 8 this way, ‘Let your mouth be open for those who have no voice, in the cause of those who are ready for death’. V. 9 tells us to not bestow favoritism, but in our judgment of a situation to judge honestly stating the truth when we open our mouth. He reminds us that there are particular groups that are more prone to needing our input and assistance saying that we should be on the lookout for how we can be of help to them.
In v. 3 of this chapter King Lemuel tells us that his mother gave him good advice advising him to not give himself to a woman who cannot be trusted. In v. 10 he goes on to say that a virtuous woman is hard to find, but they are out there and must be sought out like looking for a rare jewel. He highlights the quality of her calling her ‘virtuous’ indicating that many are not virtuous while also giving us the impression that only a smaller percentage of individuals have these traits. Using the word virtuous he challenges us to set the goal for what we are looking for. Note he does not say beautiful, or someone with a lot of money or status. He tells us that this ‘great find’ is someone that loves God and is putting some effort into serving Him, righteousness and good deeds being a part of their habit and daily routine. Using this word, virtuous, he is also stating that this person is morally pure. In saying this it is a good reminder to us that this kind of person is only interested in a relationship with someone having the same values.
He goes on in v. 10 telling us that a find like this is priceless being of great value. At first one might think that he is only making a casual impression on us of its importance. But, in reality, one who finds a virtuous person will be ahead in many ways including financially thus using the word ‘priceless’. In the verses that follow King Lemuel will tell us of the practically of such a find applying life in a practical way using the precepts of Proverbs making a little bit go a long way and investing the little and getting a great return.
In v. 11 he reveals the best benefit…peace of mind… and trustworthiness saying that you do not have to be following this person around wondering what they are doing or what they are up to. There are no worries with this person…wondering if they will be faithful or looking for an opportunity to spoil you taking the money and jumping ship into a more lucrative and possibly more beneficial relationship. In v. 12 instead he tells us to go ahead and enjoy…not to worry, she (he) can be trusted.
He goes on in the following verses to list the things that make this person a prize. It would be good to take notes on the things that he says are important. They are different standards than we might have and surely different than what we are programmed to think from the media and other sources which give the impression that the only thing that matters is looks and beauty. Here he gives the real things that make this find so valuable.
At the end of v. 12 he makes the point that this person is committed to a long term relationship and commitment making the point that they will be together till ‘death do them part’. V. 13-4 makes the point that this person is willing to be a part of the answer, making it in life together, being willing to have learned and willing to learn new skills that are practical and resourceful in surviving life.
It mentions specifically flax and wool indicating having learned how to make clothing an economical part of life. In our day it would be practical to know how to sew, but in reality making one’s own cloths is not always the best use of their time nor is it always the most economical. However, a modern day translation might include someone being resourceful in finding the ‘deal’ or not always needing the most fancy, expensive or latest trend items considering all options making a practical and prudent choice being frugal in the process. In v. 14 it says that in doing so she magically knows how to make money and resources streeeettttch and because of the extra from what is saved with these practices obtains other things making life work better. V. 14 also gives the picture that this person uses their gifts and talents being creative able to compete in a world market or environment if necessary, but satisfied to use their gifts and talents in a simpler way sacrificing self achievement and career goals for the ones they love.
In v. 15 it says that she is willing to sacrifice her own luxuries and pleasures rising early for the benefit of others. Here it makes the point that she is not only interested in her family, but has a good heart caring for others that can often be overlooked and treated as less than human.
V. 16-9 gives a unique picture of the family unit that is in it together, everyone doing what is necessary and what they can to do to make life work for all, even if it comes out of their own pocket. She (he) does not have the attitude that that is not my job, but is willing to help and do whatever it takes to make it work, women willing to do what might have been considered men’s work and men willing to do the same. It is called true ‘love’, giving everything you have to the cause. V. 17 reminds us that this person is tough and is not defeated easily not afraid to get tough and dig deep into their soul and being for strength. V. 18 says that she is confident of her gifts and abilities, her confidence not turning into defiance and self reliance becoming self serving and self centered, but instead being proud of her accomplishments appreciating and believing the praise given her. She knows she has done well. It makes her glad. Because of this she is motivated to work well into the night knowing that her labor is not in vain. V. 19 reminds us that her hands are never idle always busy doing something to make life better for her loved ones.
V. 20 says that this person has a heart of compassion willing to give even her own portion to someone less fortunate and in true need.
She is one that looks ahead as stated in v. 21 being prepared for the worst, ready and not surprised when difficult things happen in life.
V. 22-5 says that she cares how she is perceived as well as her husband always wanting to look their best, not in a pompous or proud way, but dressed and presented with dignity respecting others and receiving respect in return. It would never do to let her husband or family members or servants be seen in a bad light. These verses tell us that she is well versed in all aspects of cloth and clothing from cloths to bedspreads and quilts to the making of fine material made for the purpose of selling. But, v. 25 tells us what she is really clothed in. She is clothed in her good works and the goodness of her heart saying that ‘strength and honor’ are really her cloths. She is willing to pay the price of present and temporary discomfort knowing that she will be paid back for her sacrificing at another time. These are truly special people!
V. 26 says that she is also smart. In Eph. Chapter 5 it gives a description of the family placing the father in the position of responsibility as head of the family unit, but not because he is always right. A good husband knows the value and good thing that he has in having a good wife. He seeks her counsel because he knows that she is smart. She never becomes dominant even though she is confident in her abilities. She shows respect to her husband, not being forward or always reminding him that she is right. Women who are wise have an additional attribute that men who are wise do not always have. They are kind and often can give input and decisions that not only include their head, but also their heart. For a godly woman kindness and practicality carries a lot of weight in their decisions and advice because they realize that the outcome of these decisions will in the end effect people.
V. 27-8 provides insight into the heart and makeup of a godly woman. They won’t stop doing good. It is part of their makeup, part of their fabric and being. They do not have to be made to be busy or forced to do something. It is not in them to be lazy. They are fed by knowing that they are caring for those they love and are willing to sacrifice everything that they have, even their life, for those that they love. All this person needs to keep going is praise, and praise is what they get, from every direction.
In v. 29 he encourages the younger women to go the extra mile and find the gift and prize that a woman of virtue receives. She gives a lot, but in return gets back much more receiving high marks of praise being told that she is excellent and excels most by giving her all. In this she is given all that she is looking for being appreciated by all those that she loves so much becoming the most proud woman on earth. In saying this in v. 29 King Lemuel reminds us to not only appreciate a spouse like this, but to be sure to tell them so. Praise is the most highly prized benefit they can receive.
V. 30 concludes reminding us what is really important. This world sells the beauty and charm in front of a camera or even on facebook, but King Lemuel advises us to look deeper saying that these things are deceitful. He concludes with the most important virtue a woman can have, that is that she fears the Lord and loves Him and His laws. V. 31 ends by reminding those who benefit by someone like this to not take advantage of them letting them receive the natural fruits of their labor and love being sure to praise her publically in any way possible letting her know just how special she really is.
